Saturday, August 14, 2010

The essence of Vancouver, BC

The weekend of August 7th was the wettest weekend in the history of Vancouver getaways. It poured and drizzled and misted my hair into a beautiful frizzy mass on the top of my head. Despite the less than perfect weather, the rest of the weekend was fantastically blissful and, dare I say, honeymoon-like.

With water soaking up to our knees we dodged puddles to find our seats at Cirque du Soleil's, Kooza. If you've never seen a Cirque du Soleil show you must go - a way better solution than a movie on a rainy day in any city. And, if you can pay to sit next to an older woman that squeals with delight at the slightest of death-defying tricks, then you've just paid for your tickets three times over. I swear the show organizers planted this woman in the audience. During the second half, two men wearing nothing but spandex mounted two spinning wheels of death and, completely disregarding the rules of gravity, proceeded to run and jump and flip in mid-air, hanging from the ceiling...and the howling, shrieks of glee pouring out of the woman next to me made me laugh so hard I was near tears by the end of the show. I was sure she would either have a heart attack or an orgasm right there in the folding seat under the big top.

The next day, totally ignoring the soggy clouds settling street-side in Vancouver, we ventured off to Grouse Mountain. Expecting the untethered wilderness of say Mt. Si or Rattlesnake Ridge, we instead entered into the Disneyland of the outdoors. After a quick gondola ride into dense fog, we emerged to find, I am not joking you, a lumberjack show, bears in cages, birds on leashes and (for the untethered wilderness part) completely unmarked hiking "trails."

I know, I know, I'm boring you with a play-by-play review of the activities available for a weekend getaway in Vancouver. But the point is, not even an unmarked hiking trail in ankle-deep sledge, soaking showers threatening to halt outdoor adventure plans or a surprise baby-octopus tentacle popping out of a deep fried tube of I-don't-know-what managed to jostle SG#1 into a tizzy. Who is this guy?!

I must say, after a long conversation about our "Top-10 -Must-Haves-In-A-Totally-Hypothetical-Partner-List," a good travel partner is pretty high on mine. Although travel can be an intense snapshot of deflated expectations, downpours on the beach and stolen wallets. Travel is also just you and your partner against the world. And, if you can turn rainy days and slippery, boulder-scaling trails into fun adventures, then hopefully bad days at work and your future children covered in vomit (yep, I went there) will just be another rock on the trail making up a beautifully manicured pathway to happily-ever-after...Ha! SAPPY! But seriously, I think a weekend getaway is a good gauge for what it would be like to be on SG#1's "Amazing Race" of life and I must say, I like what I far.

I am all kinds of cheese today, but one more thing...if you're ever in Vancouver for dinner GUU is the way to go. GUU is the edible, restaurant version of an orgasmically squealing woman sitting next to you while watching body twisting circus tricks at Cirque du Soleil.


  1. LIKE!!

    ...see you @ dinner Monday.

  2. Wow, sounds like you had a fantastic time! :D

  3. you made me LOL in an internet café. loved it!