Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Toaster for Two

After burning my bagel under the broiler for the millionth morning in a row, I got in my car, stomach still growling from hunger, and drove to Target to by myself a toaster. I stood in the appliance aisle examining the toasters and decided on one with a huge "price cut" sticker hanging to the side (I am a student after all). It's stainless steel, has wide slots for bagels, comes equipped with automatic toast boost (who knew toasters could have so many features) and...it toasts for two.

I didn't purposefully purchase a toaster with four slots in order to accommodate a future frequent house guest (if you catch my drift), but as I plugged in my new toaster for two I remembered a story from The Secret that had made me a little uneasy the first time I read it. I don't usually read/buy into books like The Secret, but it does have some good pointers about the power of positive thinking, which can never hurt (I'm still waiting for my winning lottery ticket).

Anyway, the passage is a story of a woman who searches for a mate. She makes lists about what she wants him to be like, imagines herself with him and then realizes her actions are contradicting her thoughts. The book goes on to describe ways the woman (and all people searching for their mate) should act to let the universe know they are ready for him/her, namely parking on one side of the garage so as to leave room for a future mate, sleeping on one side of the bed (not in the middle), and even clearing out half of your closet. Yes, you read it correctly: clearing out half of your closet!

Now, I'm no shopaholic, but my closet is not large enough to clear out room for a mate that I don't even know exists (yet), I don't have a garage at my house and I already sleep on one side of the bed (to no avail). I also find it highly unlikely that there is some guy out there in the universe clearing out half of his closet just waiting for me to move in all my sweaters and scrubs! So, universe if you're listening/reading this blog, please take my toaster for two as my sacrificial lamb of mate seeking and send me a jam-loving, bagel-toasting mate to share my toaster for two!


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. I loved the finale/appeal to the mating gods/goddesses. :)

    (sorry about the delete, juggling multiple gmail accounts.)